For about a week Haylie had asked me if we could do a project or paint. My answer was always the same, "We don't have time right now, I have to _____________." Fill in the blank, laundry, dishes, etc, etc. So on that paticular morning I decided that we would do what ever they wanted to. The first thing out of her mouth. Paint! So we gathered all the stuff together and I sat them down still in their pajamas and got them started. And while I really didn't want to do dishes, I knew it would drive me insane if I didn't get them done. So there I stood in the kitchen unloading the dishwasher, and this is the conversation that unfolded.
Haylie: Mom?
Me:Yes
Haylie: Don't you like to paint ?
Me:Yes
Haylie: Does it make you Happy?
Me:Yes
Haylie:Then why aren't you painting with us?
Its that simple isn't ? I think as adults and especially parents we get so caught up in the "to do" list that we forget the simple pleasures in life. Are we taking time to refill our own cup? Or are we always feeling empty and drained?
So I painted, and we listened to music (and that lasted all day). I let them choose what the wanted to eat, we stayed in our pajamas all day. And there was no screaming, no mommy meltdowns, no fighting. Just harmonious creative joy.
When my husband came home, the kids ran and gave him hugs and kisses. And he looked up at me from the onslaught with a wide eyed grin. I simply smiled. He asked how my day had gone and I gave him the run down. And he just stood there staring, "Not one fight?" I smiled and continued to cook dinner (which really was breakfast because that's what the kids wanted).
Later that night after I put the kids to bed (at 9:30 which never happens during the summer), as I enjoyed the silence in my home. I realized a couple of things.
1. Take some time everyday to do something that brings you joy. Am I saying that you should throw all responsibility out the window. No. But take 15-20 minutes everyday and do something/anything that brings you joy.
2. Take time to really listen to your kids. I was amazed at all the different things my five year old wanted to talk or had questions about. I am convinced that she really has a mind of a 20 year old.
3. Take time to take care of yourself. I bet you are as guilty of this as I am you get so busy taking care of all the little things and other people that you don't have time at the end of the day to take care of yourself. Here's what I am saying..... MAKE TIME. If you are on 'empty' all the time, no one is going to be happy least of all you. And our kids feed off of our energy. Like attracts like. If you are happy your kids will in most cases be happy too. Even if they aren't happy I guarantee that your day will be a lot smoother if you are in a good mood. Take care of yourself, your family will thank you.
These are the things I have committed to doing since that day and I can honestly say that it has made a HUGE difference in everyone's attitudes. After all 'If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."
Wishing you Joy and Happiness....
